Goodbyes as the norm

A recounted conversation (via text message) from yesterday:

Friend L: I'm in your neighborhood today. Can I stop by and see you this evening?

Me: Sure, I'm home after 5 and A is leaving for the airport around 6.

L: Should I come by later? I don't want to interrupt your goodby time.

Me: Are you kidding? Saying goodbye to him for a trip is as traumatic to me as you saying goodbye to F every morning. No big deal.

And it's true. Yesterday when A left for his trip (a 4 day) I couldn't even be bothered to get my rear off the couch. He got uniformed up, gave me a kiss, got a see ya later, and hit the door. His leaving for multiday trips is just so routine now that I don't even think about it. Meanwhile, my friends freak out when their significant others are gone overnight on trips and can hardly say goodbye.

Frankly, I don't mind when A is gone. And I really dig having the entire king size bed to myself (and the baby). It's so awesome to be able to switch sides and find a nice cool spot when I wake up hot during our warm summer nights. I've even caught myself wondering if I can come up with a reasonable excuse for A to sleep in the extra bed so I can have our bed to myself. That's a true confession of a pilot's wife right there.

The 6 months of adjustment

I can't believe that tomorrow Babyzilla will be 6 months old. Already. How did that happen? He is adorable, the apple of my eye and Daddy's first and last thought every day. It would nice though, if he could get the night waking down to 2 times a night instead of 4. What can I say- he's a boy who loves boobies.

Things are finally settling in and I can enjoy my time again. Kidzilla's been shipped off for his annual summer in California and most nights it's just me and baby. A still has a crappy schedule with 12 days off a month and only 1 weekend. I still wish he'd bid down and get a good reserve schedule but he prefers knowing what his trips are going to be. He's flown with some characters lately that I mean to blog about, but haven't gotten around to yet.

My in-laws are coming to visit again this fall. A is doing his best to mitigate the intrusion into our lives that this is going to cause (ie, doing his job as a good husband to keep me from getting too annoyed). We'll see how that goes. For now, I've got just 6 weeks left until graduate. Me, with a Master's degree- I never thought this would happen. Now to find a job that pays enough to pay off those loans...

Syncronicity

Sometimes the fates align and A gets a schedule that is just right. Like the one in December when he got the entire week we were moving off. And the all weekends off schedules of January and February. It's been getting a little harder to get good schedules as he's moving from the high rungs of the bottom of the barrel (ie reserve) to the lower rungs at the top of the barrel (a hard line). Sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn't.

Kidzilla had a long weekend at school and I had no place to send him while I worked. It just so happened that A was flying into our hometown that morning for a long layover. How convenient! So he ditched the rest of the flight crew and instead spent the day at the dentist, getting a hair cut, watching Kung Fu Panda 2 with Kidzilla and helping get Babyzilla's pictures done in the evening.

I only had one day that I needed him to have off in all of June. Kidzilla and I are spending a week at Cub Scout day camp. The one camp that is running during the week he is available is far enough away that it's easier for me to just stay and work at it instead of making two trips a day. Plus, I love working at camp. This year Kidzilla is old enough for the one night campout they have. BUT, A couldn't get the night off and there is no one to stay with Babyzilla at home. So I can't stay with Kidzilla. Not only does A have to work that night, but he has a trip that lasts nearly the entire week which means no help with Babyzilla when I'm exhausted from camp every evening. And since the company is running lean on staff right now, there's no chance to switch things around.

We'll just make due the best we can, like always.

Hotel freebies

A stays in a lot of hotels. It's the nature of the job. If we wanted to, we could go without buying soap, shampoo, lotion, mouthwash, shower caps and shoe shine kits for the next 10 years. But I'm much to picky for hotel brand toiletries. Unless they are the Aveda ones he brings home occasionally.

Instead, I've become a notepad junkie. I love to make lists. About anything. It helps clear my mind and keep me organized. And with the wide variety of hotel notepads A has access to, I can always find the perfect notepad for my need. The Country Inns and Suites one is small with lines- perfect for short notes slipped into A's suitcase or Kidzilla's lunch. Radisson and LaQuinta are small and perfect for keeping bedside, in the purse, car or diaper bag. Hyatt Place is long and narrow- perfect for a grocery list. Crowne Plaza and Pur are bigger- just right for next to the phone at home and work. Sheraton is two-tone, with lines perfect for Kidzilla to write on. The Inn at Ellis Square had a huge lined one that is perfect for making notes on at work. And my all-around favorite is from the Fiesta Inn- it's lined, good sized and comes with check boxes (check boxes!!!) to I get the glorious feeling of checking things off my list. We also have a huge assortment of matching hotel pens, but they are mostly indistinguishable. They are great for keeping on my desk at work though because it's no big deal if someone walks off with them. And everyone in the office knows that if it's a hotel pen it's probably mine.

We are also the proud owners of approximately 1 bazillion Crowne Plaza plug in nightlights. If there is ever a fire, we can follow the trail of lights to the nearest exit. Which in some cases may be located behind us.

I take my perks where I can get them.

Becoming the mother I want to be

After lamenting in the last post about how I'm not able to have the lifestyle I thought I would, I have to remember that there are still good things. I am still evolving and doing things differently this time around. I feel like this time I have more support for doing things that are not quite the mainstream. Or maybe A just lets me run rampant over him in the parenting realm. Whatever it is, I appreciate it. This time around I am:

• Breastfeeding the baby- last time, I lasted two weeks and caved to the formula and bottles beckoning me from the cabinet when I was sore. This time I refused to keep any formula in the house and pushed through the soreness. And while, for me, nursing is not the glorious, womanhood fulfilling sap-fest that videos make it out to be, it is pretty cool. And cheap compared to the special allergen free formula I would have to purchase otherwise.

• Cloth diapering- last time, my partner wasn't into cloth diapering. Or changing any diapers Or parenting a baby much at all. This time, we have the cloth diapers, the diaper sprayer A attached to our toilet and A will happily run a load through the wash. And keep me in giggles while pretending to carry on about how terrible changing diapers is. Unless it's the middle of the night, when he makes the changes as quietly as possible.

• Co-sleeping- Yes, I sleep with the baby in bed with me. It is a wonderful way for us, and A when he's here, to feel close to the baby after we've been apart all day. And it makes breastfeeding easier. And I get more sleep. We are extremely cautious of pillows, blankets, pets or Kidzilla on the bed around the baby. And to paraphrase a respected expert on the subject- People die from choking every year but we won't try to tell people to avoid eating. Babies die in car accidents every year but we don't outlaw babies riding in cars. Instead we try to find ways to make those activities as safe as possible. Bed sharing should be the same way.

• Aside from the giant hunk of plastic Exersaucer that I bought today, second hand at least, for the most part we are avoiding plastic toys. And anything that plays music. Baby gets the expensive wooden, European made, organic made variety of stuff. We show our love by paying twice the cost for the toy I guess.

For Mother's Day, I'm counting all this as progress towards becoming the mother *I* want to be. Now to go retrieve Babyzilla from being lovingly encased in Fisher-Price designed faux arms...