Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Making the big push

We are in the throes of moving agony. 4 more days until we load the truck. We are doing pretty well staying on task and getting rooms packed up. We have been able to pack up the kitchen completely; since I managed to line up dinner (and a lot of lunches) with friends there is no need to cook anything else. Today we are sweltering through the heat put off by the self clean cycle on the over, which makes the indoor temp about equivalent to the heat outside- a robust 85 degrees at 9:45 am. It's a race to the bottom to see who will crack first- me or A- and through the first stress related hissy fit. It will probably be me. Sparked by him.

I still can't believe that all of this has come to fruition. It was about a year ago that I finally decided I needed to go back to school and do something better than be a lazy, underpaid secretary. It's been college tours, GREs, application essays, financial aid documents, housing applications and "how in the heck are we going to do this" for the last year, but the actual end result of me being in college has been this nebulous, far off in the future thing. And now it's here. And I'm a little bit nervous and wondering what I have gotten myself into. But we've made it through everything else, we can make it through this.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Updating your status

I always find it interesting that A still tells people that he is an Airline Pilot when he is introduced to them. And he leaves off the part that goes- "who has been on disability for 18 months due to cancer". I always wonder if it's a coping mechanism, an attempt to deny the reality of what's going on, if he's embarrassed of having cancer or something else. Even though what A tells people is completely up to him, I always feel like he's not telling the whole truth to people and he should. Since he's so into social media lately, I told him it was time to update his status from "airline pilot" to "pilot by trade but currently disabled".

We recently had dinner with a physician friend who has had a relapse of brain cancer. Although his course of treatment makes it much more obvious that he has an illness (the shaved head featuring a surgery scar and bald spot from radiation) he said that he does the same thing. Both A and our friend concurred that part of the reason was because they didn't want the sympathy that is generally (ingenuinely) offered once cancer is mentioned. Partly because they didn't want to be treated differently, as sickly, and partly because they want to pretend it isn't happening. It was an interesting A-ha moment to hear that our friend felt the same way and that it wasn't just A's particular personality.

And after 18 months of whining, asking around and pestering I've finally found a cancer support group. I flipped open one of those local "news and opinion weeklies" and found right there a listing for a support group, not just for cancer, but thyroid cancer specific, that meets at a local library. And it is so apropos that I found it two weeks before we are due to leave town.

It's been too long...

I can't believe I've let so long go by since I posted. I know several bloggers who have lost some momentum and are taking a spring/summer and I guess by default I'm in this category too. But at least I can blame it on a week long visit from my dad and our impending move. Some tidbits of what I've been up to (and had thoughts of blogging about):

Yesterday we brought home my first ever, just for me, brand new car. It only had 25 miles on it. Every other car I've had has been a hand me down from Dad (the '89 Jimmy and the '92 pick-up A now drives), certified used (the 2000 Explorer), for some one else (the ex's Jetta) or from some questionable used car dealer (the Lincoln and the Honda, both of which I've run though in the past 3.5 years). I'm so glad to have a car under warranty that I won't have to worry about for the next 5 years. Now I can worry about A carrying on about the spot I got on the carpet when I spilled the xyz instead. We took advantage of the Cash For Clunkers deal from the gov't and are turning in the truck for a new little car for A as well. God bless the dealer for finding us financing for two new cars on the sketchy incomes of a guy on disability and a girl on unemployment. We know we can afford the payments, but really I know that lenders prefer people who appear a little more stable.

Kidzilla's been gone for nearly 4 weeks now. I can't believe it's been so long. I'm usually pretty hands off when he's gone; I'm not the helicopter mom calling for reports on his daily activities. So I've emailed him twice, gotten one video link and spoken on the phone with him once. During the phone call he said he wanted to go back to playing solitaire on the computer and that the phone was too heavy for him to hold. Yep, I was feeling the love. Currently he's with Grandma and Grandpa for a few weeks before going back for some more time with his dad. I got a picture from their journey sledding (yes, on the snow!) in the Sierra-Nevada Mountains. It was one of those "damn I miss California" moments. Until I remembered how much I hate earthquakes.

We have been making lots of time for adult fun with Kidzilla gone. We went to a concert for the first time in 4 years and have been able to hang out at the bar without having to consider the babysitter while we are out. We went to a 24 hour movie marathon at a friends house where we watched 14 movies consecutively. A made it through the whole shebang without so much as a yawn; I slept about 3 hours cumulatively. I've had the opportunity to connect with some old friends on Facebook and met some new ones thanks to A's social networking connections. (To connect with me on either Facebook or Twitter, email me at the address on the right.)

The visit with Dad was good. It was so damn hot that we didn't do much during the days (Jax is a pretty outdoor venue city) and just kinda hung out. We went to all the cool restaurants, for a dip in the Atlantic, and took Dad for his first visit to the Bass Pro Shop.

My days are filled with exciting tasks such as packing up the kitchen, changing addresses, reserving the rental truck, changing utilities. We've got lots of lunches and dinners planned with friends in the next two weeks before we head out. Most of our stuff that isn't going with us is already in storage, which is good. Except when I decide I really do need that Tiffany serving platter or A realizes that I packed away his favorite shot glasses (I was hoping he wouldn't notice...).

And that's really all there is to tell.